Slip of the Tweet

A few wrongly chosen words can really get you in hot water these days, as well-known TV personality and Motivator found out in a hard way. His comments (perhaps not ill intended though certainly revealing a personal judgment not exactly inspiring) about how women who smoke, drink and stay out all night clubbing, would not a good wife make, might raise a few eye brows and incredulous snorts at a Jakarta dinner party, but when broadcast at Twitterland, subjected to instant reTweets and created a tsunami of responses that made him headline news material on mainstream media, turned him from famous inspirator into infamous hater of funloving women overnight.

So traumatized was he by the controversy his 140 character Tweet generated that he did the social network version of suicide by closing his Twitter account of over twenty thousand followers.

He already expressed regrets but the damage was already done. Interestingly enough the furor created by his unfortunate Tweet also gave rise to groups openly supporting him and who shared his views of smoking and partying women and actually spawned a lively debate among netizens that would be an interesting study on modern day relationship by sociologists.

Too bad Mario himself pulled the plug on the issue, most probably for fear it might affect his credibility and his ratings, before it became too much of a fodder for the infotainment paparazzi. It would certainly be enlightening to know what the majority of upwardly mobile middle class Indonesians consider to be the criteria for a good wife (or good husband for that matter.)

But that's besides the point. Model and TV celebrity Luna Maya also learned the hard way, that when you're famous and have unkind things to say, it's best to keep them to yourself and not allow the words to be uttered let alone see the light of day in the form of re Tweets by her thousands of followers and visible to the millions of Twitter users in the country.

The point is, instant social networking that is at one's fingertips, is not an extension of one's thoughts or one's personal diary, however much it feels like it. Yes, people post what they have for breakfast, lunch and dinner, what film they've just watched and whether it was good or bad. But many also gush about their mundane, private and even most intimate thoughts they would hesitate sharing with another face to face, but which for some reason they find easier to express typed on their mobile phones or computer.

In a way it feels private, almost as if you're talking to yourself or capturing and jotting down the fleeting thoughts, feelings and opinions one has on practically anything in life before they're forgotten. Until that is, you have some honest opinions about some sensitive or touchy issue and you happen to be a public figure with a huge number of Twitter followers.

Then suddenly that seemingly innocuous status update you wrote in between office meetings or when whiling away the time in the toilet, became number one trending topic and a million people have an opinion about you and your opinions.

The fact is, with the number of internet users, cellular phone owners and Blackberry holders in this country having increased exponentially while Indonesia is one of the fastest growing country when it comes to Facebook and Twitter, the line between private thoughts and public opinions have diminished.

Gone are the days when people feel they're not being heard or paid any attention. As Prita Mulyasari and Omni learned, attention is something that come easily these days, both welcome and unwelcome.

Social network applications and virtual connectivity means we're all living in the same goldfish bowl where everything that comes from our mouth can reverberate and magnified thousands of times over until, as Mario Teguh discovered, it consumes us.

He might have closed his Twitter account and taken back his words, but the fact is they are still out there, taking a life of its own as a public discourse and urban legend faster and more effective than any of his television program or public appearance would.

And it is not only celebrities and public figures that need to watch their status updates. School pupils are being expelled for posting rude comments about their teachers. Government officials and employees could get fired for saying negative things about their place of work. Jilted boyfriends sue their girlfriends for being bad-mouthed while a woman has walked out on her husband because he put his relationship status on his Facebook as single.

So what are we to make of these phenomena? Certain quarters want to control the cyberspace, an idea that got shot down even before it took off, as the cyberspace is not the best forum in which to discuss its restriction and limitation.

The best way is to view these handy technology not as mere modern tools communication, but more than that, it is the very extension of our tongue and manifestations of our thoughts. The key is to stick to the old adage and what your grandma always told you, if you can't say something nice, better not to say anything at all.